INTRO.

[ultrapenumbramods]

You wake up feeling like you’ve had a rough night’s sleep… maybe a bit jet-lagged, if you’re familiar with the feeling, or perhaps like you, uh, had a little too much to drink last night. Either way, you’re probably not expecting to wake up in a forest clearing, so that might be even more disorienting. It’s not an unpleasant place to wake up, mind. It’s sunny, and there’s a pleasantly cool breeze blowing through. The grass isn’t tall enough that you could get lost in it or that someone could be hiding in it… or something.

There are, in fact, a lot of somethings surrounding you--a veritable menagerie of creatures, some of them adorable, and some of them intimidating… but they seem to be as disoriented as you are. And then, well… you realize something’s a little off about yourself. There’s no pond to look at your new appearance, but… maybe the ground’s a little closer. Maybe you don’t actually have arms and legs at the moment. Maybe you don’t have eyes anymore?

Regardless, something’s definitely up. Fortunately, there’s a path leading out of the clearing, so once you get your bearings and speak with some of the other weird critters you’ve woken up with, you can find… somewhere you can get answers. Well, hopefully, anyway.

Comments

[meteorman]

[Some of the new arrivals are freaking out. Really, that's more than understandable. Being transported somewhere totally foreign and shoved into a body that's totally alien is a difficult thing to process... unless you're Stanford Pines, who has been kicked from universe to universe for the past thirty years and is, by now, not impressed. If anything he's most annoyed that it seems as though his brother didn't come with him, though considering his new alien form it's not impossible that Stanley is here and simply unrecognizable.

Okay. No legs, not really, which is strange. The little nubby things protruding from the sides of his new round body don't count. Wings -- that's neat, though his instinct is to use them as hands even if they're not really built for it. He tries to push himself upright and just kind of rolls sideways, which means he flails one of the limbs to brace himself and winds up flapping it directly in someone else's face. Or face-equivalent.]

Sorry -- sorry. [You're all lucky this is post-canon grandpa and he has something approaching basic social awareness.] I've never had wings before.

[Even once he's got the hang of moving with a little more grace there's still a pronounced learning curve to flying. Booo. This sucks. He didn't spend literal decades honing his body into a survival machine for this. But, well. We make the best of what we have.]

Have you seen something that looks like me, but in noticeably worse shape?

[Why would his twin not be the same... whatever he is.]

[makehistoria]

[Stocke looks up. And up some more. He has to take a few scuttling steps back to really get the full view of this... round individual. (This not-having-a-neck thing is getting to be a pain.)]

[He can pretty definitely say he hasn't seen anyone else like this, though.] No.

Were you expecting someone?

[meteorman]

My brother. Who was with me up until whenever I lost consciousness and was transported here.

[Hm. Don't like this. Either the Bermuda triangle has a much wider range than he thought it did when he charted their sea route around, or something fucky is going on.

At least he doesn't seem at all bothered by being spoken to by what looks like a tailless horshoe crab.]

[makehistoria]

...I haven't heard anyone here saying they showed up in a pair. [Or more, for that matter. Though it doesn't preclude someone lying about it...] You think he'd have come with you?

[meteorman]

I can't imagine why he wouldn't have. We share the same genetics and were incredibly close spatially at the time. There are very few variables that could have made any meaningful difference.

[makehistoria]

...sounds like you can hazard a guess at what brought us here.

[meteorman]

[He shakes his head, which actually means he shakes his whole body.]

Not as such. Assuming that you, like me, are not familiar with this area or the body you're currently in, it's safe to say we have all been transported to some other reality. That is the part I'm familiar with. The how or why, I don't know.

[makehistoria]

[Ah. About as helpful as the "we're all ghosts" person. (People? There was someone else yelling about spirits.)]

[Which Stocke would be frustrated by but, again, it's not like he has anything better to say.]

[The Kabuto's legs tick on the grass. It's not very satisfying without a hard surface.]

[Okay no he's a little frustrated]

[Despite that:] I'll keep an eye out for your brother.

[meteorman]

[Ghosts isn't a bad guess, but probably not likely here. Put that in the 'probably not' pile.]

He answers to Stan. You'll likely find him trying to steal something.

[It's like making a lost dog poster only the dog is your brother and also an idiot.]

[moonfang]

Uh, no. [The blue pawniard squints at Ford, trying to make heads or tails of him] What in the heck're you supposed to be, anyway? At least most of these other things look like animals or... balls.

[meteorman]

[See, a lot of people would probably answer 'hell if I know, this new body's crazy'. But Ford is Ford, and he looks down at himself with one critical blue eye. He's been able to catch glimpses even if his tiny stalk neck isn't incredibly articulated.]

I'd say I'm very clearly some variety of avian. Perhaps a condor or a hummingbird, if you were to consult the ancient Peruvians.

[moonfang]

You want a mirror or somethin'? Don't break your neck.

[Zangetsu helpfully holds out the larger of his two blades, the surface polished to reflective perfection. Take a lookie-loo, Ford!]

I've never seen a condor or a hummingbird in person, but I'm pretty sure they don't look like that.

[meteorman]

[Oh. Hah, yep. He does a slow circle in the air, taking himself in on that blade (why doesn't he get knife hands? He wants knife hands!).]

They do drawn as several-hundred-foot long geoglyphs. The ancient Peruvians were not skilled at photorealism, particularly not at that scale.

[moonfang]

[knife hands aren't all they're cracked up to be! He doesn't even have knife thumbs....]

Peruvians...? Like... the country in South America? Is that where we are? [he pauses, putting one of his knifehands to his chin] ... I expected there to be more Spanish. And.. ya know, humans.

[meteorman]

Oh, no. I have no idea where we are.

[It's said with a lot less concern than he actually feels here.]

Maybe theories about ancient human construction being alien-influenced is more true than many would like to believe.

[moonfang]

Auuugh!! You don't know where we are, either?! [please pause for tantrum. He snarls and slashes wildly at the nearby foliage, making a nice chopped salad]

You don't seen very upset!

[becauseyou]

[ Natsukipuff's here. And she's trying to take in Ford's appearance, but she's still befuddled. What is he? Why do some people get a weirder form than others? This is weird... ]

Uh, no, sorry. You're the only... whatever-you-are here! [ As in, the only Sigilyph here. Not that Natsuki would currently know what a Sigilyph even is. ]

[meteorman]

[At least in Ford's case he'd have been disappointed if his new form wasn't a little weird. You put him in an alien body and don't make him look totally incomprehensible? Rude.]

Hm. I can't imagine what variable might have led to me appearing here if he didn't.

[Except that he's Ford and these things just happen to him.]

[becauseyou]

[ Variable? Huh?

The Jigglypuff attempts to cross her nubby arms the best she can. ]

So, you just woke up here like the rest of us? Ugh, same! I can't make heads or tails of this!

...Guess you don't have the slightest clue what's going on either, huh?

[meteorman]

[Oh no. Watching an orb try to cross her teensy little arms is the best thing he's seen today so far. Not that he's not still very concerned, but this is pretty cool.]

Nothing beyond vague guesses. We were all gathered from elsewhere and altered from our standard species for reasons unknown. That is the extent of my knowledge.

... At least I have to assume you aren't usually what appears to be sentient cotton candy.

[becauseyou]

O-Of course I'm not usually--

...Wha-- Cotton candy?! [ excuse you sir she's a balloon ] Do I seriously look like cotton candy?!

[meteorman]

You're pink. It was the first thing that came to mind. Would you prefer 'gumball'?

[wegotone]

[Janine happens to be hovering nearby and nearly gets smacked in the face by one of Ford's wings. She immediately cries out, indignant.]

Hey, watch your hands- [She does a double take.] ...Uh. Wings?

Guess you're tryin' to get the hang of moving around too, huh? Floating kinda came naturally for me, but I'm still workin' out the kinks.

[grantmeamiracle]

Um, I can't say I have, sorry...

[... What even are you sir...]